Have you ever been deprived of life? Try to envision yourself in my position for the next 5 minutes…
If someone asked me to use three words to describe my experience in life, I would say privation, persistence and hope.
My biggest wish was to have freedom. I wish I had the right to live a normal life and enjoy the ideals; having a college degree, a good job, an ordinary life in my house beside my loved ones. For me this was something never came. Like the desert wishing for pouring rain.
As you may know, the government in Iran is a
dictator. This regime executed two of my brothers, for their political disbeliefs. I used to visit my brother in prison before he was executed. Every time, hoping to see him again, like the sunshine behind the everlasting cloud.
My family and I were always under pressure due to our political disbeliefs towards the Islamic Republic of Iran. Living under this frustrating situation, I tried to get on with my life. I was expelled from university because I wanted freedom of expression, and I didn’t want to be forced to wear a black veil like a crow. Therefore, I never remained silent, knowing that I would be arrested very soon.
When I just turned 19 years old, I was exposed to the hardest decision in my life. Flee Iran or live under the tyranny. I loved my family and I couldn’t imagine that one day I would lack their warm hugs. However, I had to leave them in a sea of tears. It was harder than cutting off a body limb.
There is something we have no control over, destiny. I fled Iran; I managed to reach a refugee camp for Iranians in Iraq. Not knowing, that it was a closed camp. Without access to the internet or mobile phones, restricted to go outside the camp, and worse of all, no opportunity to continue my studies.
Can you imagine how hard it was? I either had to go back to Iran or accept this closed camp. I spent the next 16 years over there. Wasted youth, always on the road and my sky was black, but my heart was made of gold.
After years, the UNHCR relocated us to Albania. Unluckily after residing there for over two years, the Albanian government denied us asylum. Again losing more years of my life. Then in the sea of troubles, I had to find another solution. I migrated to Greece…
I learned one thing from my struggling life; happiness will be born from your darkest days. That's why I rise and shine, as if a new day has dawned on me.
To summarize, my past life is heart breaking. Nevertheless, I am proud to say that even though I don't have a college degree, nor a job yet, and even though I still don’t have a stable life, but I’m the underdog who never lost hope. My dreams are not so big; they are the basic things that every women gains automatically, but for me, more valuable than treasure.
“You need to spend time crawling alone in the shadows to truly appreciate what it is to stand in the sun.”
― Shaun Hick
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